Feeling stuck? Here’s what you can do
Experiments to Break Free from Stagnation
At certain times in life, you might encounter a situation where you feel stuck or keep making the same errors repeatedly. It’s common and can lead to a sense of being caught in an unproductive, never-ending loop. When this occurs, which happens to many of us, it can be perplexing and challenging to figure out how to break free from the cycle.
I. Desire to change
It begins with the desire to change. You have something in mind that you want but don’t currently have, or there’s a quality you’d like to see in yourself that’s missing right now. Essentially, you create a picture of a better version of yourself. This picture is like your goal, your future place to reach.
Figure out what you want in life and why you want it. No limits. Figure out who you want to be, If you want to be known for something or leave a legacy. Just grab a piece of paper and spill it all out. You’ll figure out the rest later.
II. Acknowledge you might be wrong
You will inevitably make wrong decisions in your life, including ones that harm others as well as yourself. They may be minor ones or ones that have a more significant impact on the people you care about the most.
Give your ego a rest. Use your mistakes as a lesson. There’s nothing to prove but there’s always something new to learn.
III. Change your environment
If you’re serious about wanting to improve yourself you need to have an honest conversation with yourself about your environment. This includes your friends, your job, your relationships, and the places you spend your free time. Anything that is sustained in your life without conscious effort. Your environment can be the wind in your sail or a headwind you need to fight against.
IV. Embrace failures and setbacks
Don’t take away negativity from your failures, use them as a tool. Don’t run away from reflection. Embrace it and learn from it, and that will give you the power to get yourself back on the right track time and time again. When you think about it, most of your learning does come from failure.
V. Contradicting your beliefs and perspective
The two most effective questions are “How certain are you, and what is the source of this belief?” Be prepared to change your worldview. The more confident we are about our beliefs, the more our brains ignore contradictory evidence, leaving us lost and blind in an echo chamber of confirmation bias.
VI. Read, Read, and Read
Books will show you new perspectives on whatever problems you may be trying to solve (lack of confidence or self-esteem, shyness, unhappiness, lack of social skills, relationship issues, sex problems, job issues, financial problems, etc, etc), and once you put the book down, what you get is a new way of looking at the problem you want to be fixed.
VII. Impatience with actions and patience with results
“Impatient with actions and patient with results” is a mindset or approach that emphasizes being eager to take action and make things happen, while at the same time understanding that the outcomes and results may take time to materialize. In this context:
“Impatient with actions” means that you are proactive and motivated to take immediate steps towards your goals. You don’t want to waste time or delay in getting started.
“Patient with results” means that you are willing to wait and not get discouraged if you don’t see immediate or quick results. You understand that meaningful changes often take time to achieve, and you’re prepared to persevere without becoming frustrated.
VIII. Get busy
Staying busy doing things is like the engine that drives us forward. Take up a hobby, a course, or a new project, and commit to physical exercise. It fuels productivity, helps us achieve our dreams, and sharpens our skills. It’s a way to conquer procrastination, find purpose, and maintain our mental well-being. Busy days lead to fulfilling lives, nurturing relationships, and financial stability. Yet, remember to strike a balance — don’t let busyness overwhelm you. Take time for self-care and rest. The key is to stay engaged, but also to find peace in the rhythm of life.
IX. Learn to manage your emotions
Recognizing your emotions and learning to manage them is one of the most important skills you can have.
Feelings are powerful and can become overwhelming at times. For example, have you ever felt so angry that you said things you didn’t mean to someone you love? Then once you calmed down, you realised that your emotions got the better of you and you wish you handled it differently?
People who are good at noticing how they feel and can calm themselves down or adjust their behavior are more likely to do well in life, have healthy relationships, and manage difficulties and setbacks.
Practice mindfulness and self-awareness to identify and understand your emotions, and employ healthy coping strategies like deep breathing or talking to a trusted friend to regulate and manage them effectively.
X. Ask for help
Seeking help when you’re stuck in life is a vital step in personal growth and resilience. It’s an acknowledgment that we don’t have all the answers and opens the door to innovative solutions and diverse perspectives. Additionally, reaching out for support strengthens relationships, providing a support network of empathy, encouragement, and guidance. It’s an act of self-compassion that relieves the burden of feeling stuck and reinforces the idea that, together, we can overcome life’s challenges and make progress.
